women in ministry

I am in the process of wondering about women in ministry and 1 Tim 2;12 and how that relates to us. At next gen they were saying that women shouldnt teach men or have authority over men. Then Dave went on to say that he is thinking that should include youth grp. This has got me thinking. When we hear a one opinion view on a topic often we can sit there and think yup that is so true and then get reactive on those feelings without stopping to think about the issue more or look up the fors and against on that particular topic which may even give us a better and bigger picture to think about the issue before making a decision.
I do have to wonder though if women in minisity is really a black and white issue as churches trying to make out it is and if people are reacting to the feminsit movement which really did go to far and so are trying to push it back again and then allowing thier feelings get into the way of the issue most prob on a more sub concious level. It seems to me that Christians spend so much time on agruing with this issue and even to the point where you have one state in a particular demonitation against the other states of the same demoniation about this acutal issue. One does have to wonder why scholars in the same demoination cant agree on this subject and whether we spend too much time in figuring this partiuclar issue out and forgetting the real issue of the Bible to spead the word and to quote from next gen 'to hand me down' the gospel to the next generation. Have we somehow forgotten that Jesus came to save the lost, the poor etc and that is what we should be aiming at and doing rather than arguing over this really in the scheme of things pointless issue whihc is most prob a grey area anyway